What Is Sex Therapy?
Sex therapy is talk-based therapy focused specifically on desire, physical connection, and intimate well-being. Through open, low-stress conversations, partners learn to communicate candidly, deepen physical closeness, and foster a more satisfying emotional and sexual bond.
True sex therapy goes far beyond physical behavior. It explores the underlying relational and attachment patterns that shape desire, vulnerability, pleasure, and safety.
While couples therapy and sex therapy overlap, they bring a different focus. Couples therapy explores attachment and emotional security, how partners create safety, closeness, trust, and reassurance with one another. Sex therapy explores desire and sexual expression, how partners experience and communicate attraction, pleasure, eroticism, vulnerability, and their individual sexual needs.
The two are deeply intertwined. Attachment creates the security to be vulnerable; desire brings energy, curiosity, and erotic connection to the relationship. Together, they create a pathway for couples to develop and deepen their practice of intimacy.
What a Loss of Intimacy Can Feel Like in Your Relationship
You’ve stopped initiating because you’re tired of feeling rejected.
You say you’re “just tired” because it feels easier than starting a conversation about sex.
You avoid casual affection or cuddling because you worry it will be interpreted as a request for sex.
You go to bed at different times because it’s easier than confronting the distance between you.
You miss feeling genuinely desired even more than you miss sex itself.
You love your partner deeply but struggle to understand where the sexual chemistry went.
You worry that wanting more intimacy makes you seem needy or demanding.
You don’t know how to say what you want without worrying that you’ll hurt your partner’s feelings.
You can talk openly about money, family, and work—but somehow not about sex.
You wonder whether losing this part of your relationship is simply what happens after years together.
What We Help With
Desire Mismatches or Low Libido
Helping high- and low-desire partners navigate the gap without blame, shame, or pressure.
Kink, CNM & Diverse Desires
Offering a sex-positive, kink-aware, and non-judgmental environment to explore boundaries, alternative relationship structures, and unique desires.
Arousal and Performance Worry
Releasing the pressure to "perform" so sex becomes a source of shared connection rather than stress.
Trauma-Related Responses
Providing a safe, gentle container for partners holding past trauma, helping you build trust and presence without triggering anxiety or shutdown.
Sex After Big Life Events
Rebuilding desire after children, illness, career transitions, or a difficult season of life.
Navigating Sexual Pain
Addressing the relational and emotional impact of conditions like vaginismus or dyspareunia, reducing pressure while collaborating alongside your pelvic health medical providers.
Life After Sex Therapy
You can say what you want without rehearsing it first.
You can feel the spark of desire and the chemistry of a deep physical connection again.
You can hear “no” without experiencing it as rejection.
You can touch each other without every touch having to lead somewhere.
You can bring up sex and intimacy without the evening going sideways.
You can talk openly about your desires, preferences, fears, and boundaries.
You can feel desired without feeling pressured.
You can be playful, curious, and spontaneous with each other again.
You can experience intimacy as a source of connection rather than tension.
You can create a sexual relationship that reflects who you are now, not simply who you were when you first met.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is sex therapy just talking?
Yes. Sex therapy is talk-based therapy. Nothing physical happens during sessions, and you will never be asked to undress or be intimate in front of your therapist. Any exercises we suggest are done privately, at home, at a pace that feels comfortable for both of you.
What if we feel embarrassed talking about sex?
Most couples do at first. Many partners have never talked openly about sex with each other, let alone with someone else. Our sessions are designed to be open and low-stress. We go at your pace, and part of the work is helping both of you find language for things that may have felt impossible to say.
How do we know whether we need sex therapy or couples therapy?
You don’t have to figure that out before reaching out. The two overlap: couples therapy focuses on how you communicate, connect, and feel emotionally secure with each other, while sex therapy focuses more specifically on desire, intimacy, and your sexual relationship. Tell us what’s been happening during your consultation, and we’ll recommend what we think fits best.
Do you work with non-monogamous couples?
Yes. We welcome couples and partners in consensually non-monogamous, open, and polyamorous relationships. Our therapists understand that healthy relationships can take many forms, and we don’t assume that monogamy is the goal. We focus on what matters in your relationship—trust, communication, boundaries, intimacy, desire, and creating agreements that work for the people involved.
Do you prescribe medication?
No. As licensed mental health counselors and marriage and family therapists, we do not prescribe medication. When concerns such as anxiety, depression, sexual health, pelvic pain, or other medical factors intersect with your relationship, we can coordinate care with your existing providers or refer you to qualified medical professionals when appropriate.